Breakfast & Hashtags - Excerpt from “The Rabbit Hole”

I woke up at 6:45, just like I do every morning.

I made myself a kale, avocado smoothie. I took pictures as I made it, making sure to catch the right angle and lighting on the kale. Carefully slicing the avocado and rotating it a few different ways for the right look. Presentation is key.

In total it took about 30 minutes to make the smoothie while documenting my every step. Then I scrolled through the pictures, picked the best, put them in a video, added some music and some captions, and posted it.

I posted it to multiple sites. It’s essential to keep a diverse social portfolio. In the end, your followers tend to go up or, God forbid, down in unison, but you never know where you’ll find someone. Once they add you on one platform, they usually go ahead and add you on them all.

Another important thing if you wanna make it as an influencer are hashtags. Both your own and other people’s. Add them to all your posts. See if you can get something trending or jump on a bandwagon.

That morning I used:

#Vibes #GreenLivin #RiseNGrind #Health #EatClean #HealthyLifeStyle #SmoothieLife #LoveMyGreens #KaleLife #AvocadoLife #HealthyFood #Healthy #Yummy #LivinHealthyWithHan

That last one was my own. I guess it was my attempt at a brand or whatever. Back then my goal was to one day have that a trending hashtag. Such a modest goal in retrospect. Such a narrow vision of success.

But my followers were growing and that’s what mattered. I told myself that a few more months at that rate and I might be able to make a real jump and influence. Monetize.

From what I’d read I could easily have already been a nano-influencer. But that was small change, and I didn’t think it was worth my time. I wanted to keep my cache. Stay virgin until the big money came knocking.

From nano the next jump was micro-influencer, which seemed to be between like 1,000 and 100,000 followers. But still it wasn’t much money. Some brands preferred micros, but I think that’s just because they’re cheap. I could live with being a micro. I’d take the extra income and all. But you can’t quit your job as a micro. Micro doesn’t change your life. And I wanted to change my life. I wanted to make a living off it and for that you didn’t need that nano or micro shit. You needed to be macro. You needed 100,000 followers.

I know 100,000 followers sounds like a lot, but it’s doable. If you’re reading this and you wanna live this life, you have to believe you can do it. No one else is gonna believe in you if you don’t. You just need some momentum. Momentum is key. Some people say that you need luck, but luck is just what lazy people call hard work. You need to believe and work your ass off.

That’s how I did it.

I don’t care much for the taste of kale, but it was all the rage online. A superfood or whatever. I made sure to smile while I filmed myself drinking it, staring up at the camera with big eyes, tasting it by sticking a finger in and sucking the smoothie off that finger, licking my lips after I was finished. I winked and said I’d check in with them later. Then I dumped the rest of it down the sink and had some coffee.

I know what you’re thinking, but who cares? Who cares who’s watching? Who cares why they’re watching? All that matters is that they’re watching. They’re following. They’re in your stable.

Next, I did some light yoga, filming it as well. It’s harder to film solo, particularly with how tall I am, but you can do a lot with creative photography and a pillow. It’s important to be able to hold complex stretches or make it seem like you can hold them. It’s equally important to show off your best features, for me my legs and my ass. It isn’t just for the creeps, though you take their likes too. Women wanna see your lifestyle provides results. They wanna see your tight ass and toned legs and believe that if they live like you, or at least follow you, they can have them too.

#Vibes # Yoga #YogaLife #RiseNGrind #EarlyRiser #Health #Fit #Workout #Motivation #Fitness #DeepStretch #YogaLove #ButtWorkout #Booty #LegWorkout #Legs #HomeWorkout #LivinHealthyWithHan

Then I went on a run, 10K that morning, stopping twice to check in. I’d stop long enough to catch my breath and then jog and film. It’s important to make it seem like you can run and talk without panting.

#Vibes #RunnersHigh #Running #CleanLiving #Health #Fit #Workout #Motivation #Fitness #MarathonTraining #PutInWork #LivinHealthyWithHan

While I was filming two police cars sped past me. I managed to get them on video. They both appeared to have been heading downtown, moving about as fast as they could. I only made a vague acknowledgment of them on the video, “hope everyone is ok” or “what’s going on there?” or something like that, before continuing my run. I had no idea then how much those cop cars and the scene they were headed to would change my life.


 

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The Painting - Excerpt From “A Campus on Fire”